Are you already all wrapped up in the Christmas season? Who’s already stressed feeling the stress?
I’ve been working on making our Christmas as stress-less as possible over the past few years. + where I’ve found our stress really originates from is expectation + consumerism. Expectation of what the season should be, + the draw to buy #allthethings for our home, for others, for ourselves…
Even as we’ve tried to simplify how we do Christmas, the draw is still there – who doesn’t get sucked in by the sparkle + warmth + texture of all the Christmas things in all the stores + advertisements?? – but so is the realization that it’s all there every single year. It doesn’t end or go away. + I don’t feel better with more stuff…I always feel better with less stuff.
Christmas glasses + mugs don’t make it feel like Christmas.
Christmas pillows don’t make it feel like Christmas.
Having piles of gifts to wrap doesn’t make it feel like Christmas.
It’s the experiences we create that make it feel like Christmas, creating that feeling of celebration, excitement, warmth, joy, love…
Playing Christmas music in the morning, while diffusing a seasonal essential oil blend. Planning out the events that signal it’s the Christmas season, + that our entire family really enjoys. Drinking mugs of apple cider or hot chocolate more often than we usually would. Never having a reason not to watch a Christmas movie. Getting outside in the snow, because it’s so magical…
We focus on having experiences, not tricking ourselves that the season is magical because we’re surrounding ourselves with things covered in sequins and glitter, with words of hygge, get cozy, joy!, ’tis the season! plastered over everything, snowflakes, snowmen, stars, + Christmas trees…ya’ know what I mean?
A few years ago my sister + I created a Christmas planner, pretty much at the same time as my mom did too (runs in the family?….). But our focus wasn’t on keeping track of the busy-ness. Our focus was on the experience.
Start by looking at what your values are, what traditions you have or want to create – what’s important to you at Christmas time. + that becomes your guiding principles throughout the season. When you’re deciding on what events to partake in, or buying gifts, planning parties or get-togethers, measure what it will cost (both financially + energetically) against what your values and traditions are. We really only remember, treasure, + can recall the feelings of what aligns with our values + the traditions we cultivate.
Here are the first few pages from our planner that you can download + print off. These go through the process of reflecting + defining what your values are + how you’ll be intentional throughout the Christmas season, then working out what that looks like #IRL.
Around the first of November I sat down + looked at all the events we usually like to do leading up to Christmas to see when they fall + what else we have going on. For example, both my son’s + husband’s birthdays fall within the first week of November, + we typically like to go to The Royal Winter Agricultural Fair (The Royal) in Toronto, which happens around the same time. I’ve been going since I was a kid, I love that it’s something that I can now do with my little, + it feels like the first kick-off for everything leading up to Christmas. Last year we weren’t able to go, + it’s because I left the planning for it until too late, + as we live a few hours from Toronto it takes a bit of prep + planning + coordinating to make it happen, especially with my two guys’ birthdays happening at this time too. This is the approach I take all the way through Christmas day.
What are our priorities?
What do we want to experience?
+ how are we going to make sure what’s important happens?
On Christmas Eve we create a Christmas Eve Giftbox – the first gift of Christmas for my kiddo + his cousins. It’s packed with hot chocolate, The Night Before Christmas to read, sometimes some new cozy socks for everyone to wear, + a note for us to record something we’re grateful for. + then we’ll watch The Polar Express. When our families get together Christmas morning my mom has always made sticky buns, it’s literally my favourite part of Christmas morning. Hot coffee, sticky bun, sitting around someone’s living room chatting, + yes sharing gifts. My favourite part of gift giving is the giving part, + that it forces everyone to slow down + savour the moments.
This year, for the most part, we’ll be giving gifts of experiences, not stuff. All the kids have more than they need or use, + same with all of us grown-ups. The thought of giving gifts (or receiving them) is lovely – the intention behind it – but how much of a gift is it when it adds to the ‘stuff’ that barely or never gets used + you have to care for it, store it, have it taking up space in your home. I feel like we’ve been purging for years, because for years I bought into ‘new is better’ + ‘the newer it is the happier I’ll be’. But it was never enough, + it finally sunk in that maybe consuming isn’t the path to happiness + satisfaction.
Giving is another huge part of Christmas – not just in the gifts for people we know, but in thinking about the needs of others. Especially at this time of year. I want to chat about that in a separate post, because it really is a topic all on its own, but teaching our kids how to care for others is incredibly important + there are so many opportunities to model that around Christmas time.
So how can you do an intentional Christmas this year? What really makes Christmas feel like Christmas for you + your family? For us it’s always been about the experiences, + I would so rather spend the available funds we do have on experiences that create real, lasting memories. These are the best gifts from my childhood, + some of the best gifts we can pass on to our littles too.